lemondrop

I experienced a really strange moment while standing in line at the grocery store. It was yesterday, the day after my twenty-first birthday. I was telling my roommate about the details of my day, and how I received a really nice phone call from an unexpected friend to wish me a happy birthday. It made my day, truly. My one and only birthday phone call of the year.

I grew up in a house where we would gather around the piano, and rehearse our song before dialing the cousin/aunt/grandparent/friend who was celebrating their birthday. We would stand around the phone, waiting for the cue that the right person had picked up, and then we’d start singing. “Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday dear ______, Happy Birthday to you!” It was just one of those things that we did, and we never thought anything of it. Some years, we’d try different ways of singing it - in funny accents, each person saying the next word in the sequence of song (which was the funniest, because with 4 people singing.. you are always the same word - HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!) - but every year, without doubt, those calls were made.

But then two things happened, and I can’t decide which to blame. Facebook happened, and growing up happened. 

Is the reason I only received one birthday call this year because I’m 21 now?  Too old for such a childish song? Or is it because technology has made it be just easier to send a text with extra !!!!’s, or a facebook wall post with a :) at the end. 

I don’t feel any less loved, and I don’t want to at all scrutinize people who chose to take the route of technology. I do it too. But I do feel disappointed that this is where our digital culture has taken us. Has it taken us so far that we feel it’s equally appropriate to type a “Happy Birthday!” instead of picking up the telephone and dialing a number to say it out loud? I want my someday children to grow up in a house that gathers around the piano, giggling with butterflies in their stomachs as they wait to sing that joyous song to somebody that they love. I want them to expect that all calls made to the house on their special day will be from somebody looking for them, with a song waiting to be sung on the other end. I want them to feel that same excitement about birthdays that I used to when I was little. Facebook just isn’t the same. Growing up, just isn’t the same. 

How do you guys feel about this? Would you rather have 75 typed “Happy Birthday!” messages on facebook, or a couple of meaningful phonecalls? 

*I should note that if you sent me a facebook message or a text on my birthday - I still love you! It’s just really sort of sad to reflect on how much our culture has changed since technology has stepped in.